Celebrating Robbie and the journey that brought us here

 If someone would have told me 5 years ago that I would be celebrating my son's birthday, I would have probably cried first rather than laughed at the statement.

 It's amazing the journey that God brings us through when that light at the end of the tunnel is completly black! God's answer for us to have a baby was "wait". At times it was hard to tell what the answer to my hearts desire was. During the 4 InVitro cycles, was a time for us to reflect on my faith and to hear what God was working in my life.  Infertility did not define me, yet I felt like it was controlling my everyday life during that time.  The inability to be in control of things was unbearable.

It's amazing to look back and see the circumstances in my life that lead me to the day I found out I was pregnant. During August 2006 I attended my neices, Kathleen and Joel's wedding. I was so happy for her and yet I found my heart aching because it was the end of our journey and the pregnancy that started rocky for 2 weeks ended in another loss.

September came around and we started looking into adoption. Suddenly the breaks went on hold and we were in the "waiting" period again. I continued to serve, go to church, pray, read my Bible and at that point heard a sermon about "waiting". It was the moment a light bulb went off or rather a lightening strike that helped with surrendering the "control" of trying to figure it all out and really knowing that wait meant to give it all to God.

Now for some of you that know how babies work, know that when it miraculously happens, the immediatly answer is "It's because you stopped trying". Well if anyone "stopped trying", then someone has some explaining to do! I'm kidding of course. Yes, I wasnt' doing IVF or doing medical procedures to get pregnant but to say I stopped trying was not exactly how it happened.

February 12, 2007 Was the day I thought would never happen. After 30 or so times of taking a pregnancy test, what I thought I would see was much different. To hold a positive pregnancy stick after trying so hard to get pregnant was the biggest suprise of my life!

October 9, 2007 the most beautiful boy named Robert Nathaniel blessed our lives. I look at him today and still remember looking at him for the first time and seeing his eyes meet mine.  I am it for him. I can look a mess and he will still tell me how beautiful I am. I can be grumpy and he will say something cute that will get me out of my mood. I am so blessed today ( writing a day early than his birthday since I will be on the road :-) that God has given us this time together. So today we celebrate Robbie and thanks for putting up with me all these years in the tears, laughter, bragging and showing off my Robbie :-)

 

20 weeks

first photo

first family photo

that lip

going to the pumpkin patch even though it was still smoky from the fires

One of my favorite photos that almost look like he is smiling at Daddy. He is less than a day old here

This was taken during our 3 day stay at Grandma Rebecca's house during the fires in October. Thank goodness daddy was off for 3 weeks.

Smile

Great Grandma Rebecca and Robbie after his dedication

                              Just try not to smile

Robbie's Mommy, Esther 

"Our journey to parenthood  had many low points but ultimately the high point was finally getting pregnant with Robbie after many years of trying, 4 failed In Vitro Fertilizations and then letting God have control of what was to come."