Friday, March 4, 2011

You Know You're a Mom...

When your handbag has more kid stuff than adult stuff in it.

When information that used to be so important to you falls out of your brain in order to make room for counting dirty diapers and remembering your child's feeding schedule.

When you can't find your handbag when going out without the kids so you carry the mini-diaperbag instead.
When you routinely accept any chewed substance offered you in your bare hand without thinking because you don't want it on the floor.

When you don't finish a cup of coffee.
When you're still in your PJs at 10am.
I'm sure there are more, but "When you're a mum you tend to forget things!!" 
When you can eat dinner, breastfeed and check your Facebook at the same time!

When you've gone to work wearing your daughter's sparkle lip-gloss instead of your lipstick.
When your favorite song is the theme to The Backyardigans.
When an ideal dinner out includes a place where you get crayons with the menu.
When you've ever had to tell a child not to lick the bottom of his shoe.
When you've wiped snot off of people who are NOT your children.
When you are no longer disgusted by talks of puke or poop.
When you will accept spit out food into your hand as a proper means of disposal.
When a Disney CD is currently in your car.
When you can change a poopy diaper at 3am without fully waking up.
When your child knows more about your iPod than you do.
When teenagers are getting younger and younger by the minute.

When you prefer a diaper bag to a purse because it has room for EVERYTHING!
When you know more kids' TV theme songs than you do popular music.
When you're willing to take pictures of the messes your kids create so that you can say "see ... you were JUST like that" when they grow up.
When you're willing to spend unbelievable amounts of time at the ballpark/gym/football field/dance recital/etc. because your child is playing/performing.
When you discover the myriad of uses for baby wipes ... and keep them on hand even when your "baby" isn't a baby anymore.

When you check the pockets of BRAND NEW pants before you wash them.

When you see your kid is going to be sick, and you know there is not time to get anywhere but where he is, and so you bend down, cup your hands and let them get sick on you and you don't even flinch, because your baby needs you. That's when I knew I was doing the mom thing, for real!

When you have crayons in your pocketbook & they are the only thing you can find to write with when you need to write something down.

When you are Black Friday shopping and tell the cashier night-night in the same voice you tell the kids goodnight.

When the goop coming out of their eyes doesn't bother you as much as what is coming out of their nose.

When you leave the house with spitup on your shirt and don't freak out about it
You forget to put on real shoes and grocery shop in your slippers because you are trying to get everyone out the door

When you dig pieces of baby wipes from your daughters nose with tweezers.
When you find hello kitty stickers all over your golden retriever.
When you know exactly how much time it takes for your cell phone to dry out from baby drool.
When you've experienced poop fingerpaint!

When your child uses the shirt you are wearing as a Kleenex for her drippy nose.
~Laura Beth

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